bullshit

it is the non consultation that bothers me. the lack of control. 

the in the fingers and then gone.

it is how the decisions, although they effect me greatly, i have no control for.

i don't even want a different outcome, 

i just wish that i was the one who had the conversations with you

seeking out others advice, others history, is all understood - but mine was not needed.

that is hurtful 

it is a double edged sword in every aspect - this i understand - this i get

but i still feel burned

i still feel sucker punched

yes you are right, there is so much good, i am thankful, there is much to love

yes, yes, yes,

but just because there is these things does not mean that harder times don't happen

that how i feel is not valid, or without reason

don't discount me or what i do because of your preconceived notions

your attitude

what you may think or feel

i am trying to be respectful of you, your pressures, your experiences

follow through for me