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it has reached the point where i cannot keep up with her

her development

her accomplishments

it feels as though every night after she is tucked safely in that i need to grieve

need to remember everything big she did

every morning it feels as though she will walk down the stairs

and be this little woman

i have not even begun to think about those days

about everything i want to teach her

will have to teach her

how everything will be different

how awful and trying it will be

but i will not rush things

i won't think about it for now

i will take these moments and hold them close

put them in my back pocket

i will sniff her hair and close my eyes

i will remember

remember

remember